The Flying Spaghetti Monster’s pirate friends sail the frigid seas… okay the sad fact is that there are fewer pirates, and since the pirate population went down, global warming went up. We need more pirates. The more pirates we have, the cooler the globe will get, the more necessity for warm hats. See? It’s an intelligent design, governed and bestowed by His Noodliness. First made for pal John the Geologist.